I came across these two verses and they remind me of my dreams and future of living in a Big 5 Game Reserve and I would like to share these with you.

Goals

The purpose of goals is to focus our attention. The mind will not reach toward achievement until it has clear objectives. The magic begins when we set goals. It is then that the switch is turned on, the current starts to flow and the power to accomplish becomes a reality.

Vision

Vision is the gift of seeing clearly what may be. Vision expands our horizons. The more we see, the more we can achieve, the more we can achieve: the grander our vision, the more glorious our accomplishment. The courage to follow our dreams is the first step toward destiny.

Gautrain Blues

There is so much blah, blah about the Gautrain I thought that I should share this with you.

TO put the cost of the new Gautrain development into perspective, Singh and Associates Strategic Solutions has come up with a few suggestions on what could be done with the R13bn extra the development will now cost (as opposed to the initially expected R7bn).

Instead of a train you could buy some top of the range S-class Mercedes Benz and park them nose to tail to form a "train" that would be long enough to go around the world.

Since most South Africans use minibus taxis instead of S-Class Mercedes Benz, you could run a fleet of taxis, free of charge to commuters, from Johannesburg to Pretoria with a taxi leaving each town every two minutes, maintain them at the AA rate of R2.50 per km, replace all the taxis every month and you would only run out of money after 50 years.

You could add 44 more lanes to the M1 highway.

If you prefer to walk, a good bricklayer, if he made little brick tiles using stacks of 30 R100 notes, could lay a blue paved walkway, 1m wide from Johannesburg to Pretoria . We would have R400 000 left over to pay the bricklayer for his work, which should only take half as long to finish as the Gautrain.

Or if you want smart people to figure this out you could pay for a university degree for every single 19 year old Gauteng resident and ask them what to do with the money

Planes Games

ONE night, a twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey . There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, the Dalai Lama, and a hippie. Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the compartment.
"Gentlemen," he began, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we're about to crash in New Jersey . The good news is that there are four parachutes, and I have one of them!" With that, the pilot threw open the door and jumped from the plane.
Michael Jordan was on his feet in a flash. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am the world's greatest athlete. The world needs great athletes. I think the world's greatest athlete should have a parachute!" With these words, he grabbed one of the remaining parachutes, and hurtled through the door and into the night.
Bill Gates rose and said, "Gentlemen, I am the world's smartest man. The world needs smart men. I think the world's smartest man should have a parachute, too." He grabbed one, and out he jumped. The Dalai Lama and the hippie looked at one another. Finally, the Dalai Lama spoke. "My son," he said, "I have lived a satisfying life and have known the bliss of True Enlightenment. You have your life ahead of you; you take a parachute, and I will go down with the plane.
The hippie smiled slowly and said: "Hey, don't worry, pop. The world's smartest man just jumped out wearing my backpack."

The funny things kids say in church:

- Three year old Reese: “Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen.”

- A little boy was overheard praying: “Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am.”

- A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?” One bright little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

- A father was at the beach with his children when his four year old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand and led him to the shore where a dead seagull lay in the sand. “Daddy, what happened to him?” the son asked. “He died and went to Heaven,” the dad replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, “Did God throw him back down?”

Locker room (you know what they say)...

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker-function and begins to talk.

Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: "Hello."
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes."
WOMAN: "I am at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only R1 000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2006 models. I saw one I really liked…"
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "R390 000"
MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing... The house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking R950 000."
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of R900 000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra R50 000. It's a pretty good price."
WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"
MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open...

He smiles and asks: "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"

Why men are happier

* Your last name stays put.
* Wedding plans take care of themselves.
* Chocolate is just another snack.
* Car mechanics tell you the truth.
* Wedding dress: R5 000; Tux rental: R500.
* New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
* One mood all the time.
* A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
* You can open all your own jars.
* Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
* You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
* The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
* You can play with toys all your life.
* You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
* You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

You *  You never have to drive to another petrol station bathroom because this one is just too icky.
* You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
* Wrinkles add character.
* Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
* You know stuff about tanks.
* You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
* If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
* Your underwear is R20 for a three-pack.
* You only have to shave your face and neck.
* Your belly usually hides your big hips.
* One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
* You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24, in 25 minutes.

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